True Fear

Sometimes you are scared by something/someone that surprises you. The fear passes. Then there is fear that sticks with you, its deep, its cold, it haunts you, and you change behavior because of it.

This second kind of fear needs to be faced head on. It must be dealt with – get help if you need it, but confront it.

Fear is evils greatest weapon. You hesitate, and you question everything. That is exactly where evil wants you. You are pliable in this state. Open to suggestion, you want to be rid of the fear. Its natural.

You stop doing what is right and start doing what is easy. They sometimes intersect.

Take a deep look at your actions – how much does fear drive them? And stop being afraid. Stand up and fight. Everyday and everytime. It will take time but soo worth it.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.

Why We Hate

Bad things happen. Sometimes apologies are made and things are corrected, sometimes not. Sometimes there is no apology. And sometimes those responsible have no idea of their actions.

Whichever the cause, the result is resentment and anger. Do we let it pass? Do we forgive and rise? Do we take it out on another? Do we pass it to our closest friends and relatives? We hate because we are taught to hate. We develop pride and ego who conspire to ‘help’ us.

We want to be rid of the pain. Anger and resentment hurt. There is no quick fix.

So the hate persists, it grows like a cancer, and spreads. Is enlightenment the lack of reaction to anger and hate?

So you hate. I hate. What does it get us? In the end? Naught but pain.

So let it go. Bad things happen but what defines us is how we handle it.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.

You Can’t Fix Them

So you fall in love. They are great, you enjoy each other, and you are good friends. You become serious and maybe move in together or become exclusive or make plans to marry.

Then things arise. Could be small, could be large, but like that pebble in your shoe, you can’t ignore it. You do the right thing – you talk to them. You ask for it to change in a way that works for you. You cannot reach them. You keep trying. You fail.

So what do you do? You try very hard to make it work and it does not. Face it. You can’t fix them. If you lack confidence, ask your friends, etc. if your requests are unusual or harsh. Get some backup. Then….do what you must. You must move on.

You will hurt from this deeply as you wished and wanted soo much more. And if its crazy stupid love, well, hold on for turbulence ahead. But keep going. Never stop.

You have value. You are important. You will be an amazing unique partner to some lucky person. You deserve happiness. No one will ever hand this to you. You must be grateful each day. You must be externally focused. Never lose sight of this. You can’t fix them.

When it just feels too much

Life is strange and wonderful. Even at its worst, there is beauty. Sometimes the hardest things create wonderful outcomes.

So today was hard. Maybe its a demon in your head or heart. Maybe its a failed relationship. Maybe you are too weak to fight an addiction. Maybe your body is ravaged by pain. Will these events define you?

Will you do your best to rise above or will you fall to the lowest common denomiator? Will you stand up for yourself and those you love? Or fall? Choose. And choose wisely not easily. Pay the price. Stand proud.

Today is another chance to choose.

So choose.

There is That Day

We all have them. The day where the previous night was rough and the following day is simply a continuation. Personal, professional, physical and spiritual its all horrid. You cannot focus and you wonder why you got out of bed.

But you did. And you are out there trying to do your best. You are trying to be kind despite what the world passes to you.

Some call it grace, some courage, some poise or presence. But it exists to some extent in all of us.

Realize what you had the courage to do today. Give yourself credit for what you have done. Get stronger today. Be kind today. If tomorrow never arrives, today will have been a good day.

Looking Inside

We all need time to reflect.  Sometimes with pride or sorrow or pain or even disgust.  We do not always like ourselves our humanity allows for great positive and great negative actions.  Those actions can return into our thoughts as anger and hatred, not just for ourselves, but for anyone nearby.  We act badly and the shame increases, the pain deepens, and our attitude and self image suffer.  The downward spiral continues until someone or something stops it.

The only person who can really change this is you.  You start by forgiving yourself.  Your past is just your past.  You cannot change it, affect it, or even really revisit it.  The flickers of images in your past can be inflamed by sounds, people, smells, food, almost anything we can sense and associate with the past.  These negative memories are the hardest to remove and cause the worst in us to emerge.  Letting go of the past is the first part of forgiving yourself.  The transgression does not matter.  And forgiveness of ourselves comes at a price.  The price is that you must behave better going forward.

Once a period of positive behavior occurs, you start to believe that you deserve forgiveness.  Eventually, you grant it to yourself believing that you deserve it.  Your negative behavior only reinforces the negative and prevents real forgiveness.  Some people are far harder on themselves than others and forgiveness comes more slowly.  The important thing to remember is that your actions can save or destroy you and in these critical times, positive actions can rebuild.  But whatever you do, you must never give up on yourself.  You are worthy of forgiveness and deserve a chance to be happy.

Forgive yourself, allow happiness to come to you, be kind to others, see yourself as a better person, and learn to love that reflection.  Do not surrender to the negative thoughts and emotions.  They will darken your soul long before your body releases you.

Be well.  Live, Laugh, and Love.