Author: heartofthebear

It Just Hurts

by heartofthebear, posted in Uncategorized

So you are driving as hard as you can and are trying to do well. Sometimes you move forward, sometimes back, but it always hurts.

The most important point is to keep moving forward and avoiding people, places, and behaviors that decrease your self-worth. Whatever you need to do that can help you avoid these things must happen. Anyone who compromises this is not your friend. They have their own agenda and you are not at the top of the list. Period. You must be ruthless in this effort, this is not about making ‘friends’ but about rebuilding yourself.

Never make yourself lesser based on someone elses opinion. If you are not harming others or yourself, chances are you should hold your head high.

The past is gone. Let it wither and die. Do not sustain it.

You can and must move forward. No excuses and no fake friends.

Be well, live, laugh, and love.

You Wonder How You Got Here

by heartofthebear, posted in Finding Meaning

So your head is in your hands with tears on your face. You are upset about the condition of your life. It happens to everyone. Something has impacted you or perhaps you have caused this pain.

Does the cause truly matter at this point? You cannot change it either way.

What matters is your response. Do you let it beat you down? Do you believe the hate and the painful words and actions? Do you let it control you? Let it, let them win?

No! No! Stand up for yourself, now in this moment make a change. Do not be lesser. For anyone. Respect yourself in that moment and pull your head up. This will pass.

You will beat this and whatever else comes. Dont you dare let it, let them win. Not now, not ever.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.

When is Sorry Too Late?

by heartofthebear, posted in Uncategorized

Everyone has received the apology that seems too late. When is too late really too late?

First, is the apology conditional? ‘I am sorry, but…’. If so, not an apology – too late.

Second, is this one of a string of apologies with no change in behavior? Too late.

Third, is the apology followed with other issues/demands? Too late.

All of these are too late. Move on. You can and should eventually forgive. But don’t forget.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.

The Hard Things

by heartofthebear, posted in Finding Meaning

Life is not simple for anyone. We all fight demons, large and small. Some come in the form of people, and some are less obvious. We are all faced with hard decisions and tough consequences. How to make this decision?

Can you sleep that night having made the decision? How about tomorrow? Next week? Next year? Right <> Easy.

This process makes decisions easier. Its still hard and the pain may last for a long time but hopefully you can move past it with your head held high.

And get some sleep along the way. Think hard, be smart, stay true.

Live, laugh, and love.

When People Change

by heartofthebear, posted in Finding Meaning

You spend copious time and effort on a relationship and somehow it changes. Sometimes for better sometimes for worse. The for better side is easy to handle but the for worse can be painful.

The worst of these is the change in your partner, close friend, or family member. It will happen. Our only true constant is change. Death is a form of change.

How do you handle these changes? Stay who you are at your core. Feed the positive relationships. Starve the negative. Hold the tiller to your course. You will get there but only through work, perseverence, and faith.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love

True Fear

by heartofthebear, posted in Uncategorized

Sometimes you are scared by something/someone that surprises you. The fear passes. Then there is fear that sticks with you, its deep, its cold, it haunts you, and you change behavior because of it.

This second kind of fear needs to be faced head on. It must be dealt with – get help if you need it, but confront it.

Fear is evils greatest weapon. You hesitate, and you question everything. That is exactly where evil wants you. You are pliable in this state. Open to suggestion, you want to be rid of the fear. Its natural.

You stop doing what is right and start doing what is easy. They sometimes intersect.

Take a deep look at your actions – how much does fear drive them? And stop being afraid. Stand up and fight. Everyday and everytime. It will take time but soo worth it.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.

How You Fight Defines How You Live

by heartofthebear, posted in Uncategorized

No matter who you are, your demons will come for you and when they do, will you be ready? Have you asked yourself the easiest way to manipulate you – what are your weaknesses? What are the words that would touch you/haunt you/scare you? What are the actions of others that bother you most? What are your deepest fears?

So if you want to be ready, start facing them right now. Ask yourself the questions – do things that bother you – interact with people that bother you. Build a thicker skin. Words are words. Actions always mean more and are harder to resist.

You must start today and start small – but start.

The stress of regular life diminishes as you face down your fears.

Be well. Live, laugh, and love.